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Thread: Depression

  1. #191
    Senior Member sore legs's Avatar
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    Mar 2010

    Re: Depression

    Quote Originally Posted by granty View Post
    interesting article.
    Sore legs, what age is she? I find I get very irritable when my anxiety levels are up. Have learned to recognise it and not take it out on other people by being grumpy and to not feel guilty about it either - when I do that it tends to go away very quickly.
    She is 35 - she has always felt panicky when younger and having to use crowded tubes to work etc but since the depression was diagnosed a couple of years ago she has been worse. She hates it when I say things like 'tomorrow you must remember to ......' just before bedtime, as then it affects her sleep. It also does not help with her family having always put on her ... having to act as the 'mother' to the family from the age of 13 due to her mum being virtually blind, standing in the way of a domestically abusive father and young brother being in trouble with police/school etc - this is what a councillor took her depression back to - it helped her as she had to learn to step back and that sometimes there is nothing that she can do and it is not her place to either. She has learnt to deal with that quite well until recently when her mother was diagnosed as suffering with dementia (shes only 55) and no-one else in her family wanted to get involved to help her with care etc, so guess what - the depression returned as it was only Keily that was trying to deal with her mothers situation.

    As for poor sleeping - she also suffers with this - takes her ages to get to sleep and until we had the baby it was not unusual for her to get up during the night and do the shopping. Now she just goes down stairs and does some jobs. When she sleeps she could hear a mouse fart which wakes her up and then it takes ages for her to get back to sleep.
    Paul C.

    ... continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential.

  2. #192

    Re: Depression

    one of the best bits of advice ive ever had was "you cant be all things to all people". its so true. theres only so much we can take. trouble is when u live on your nerves it sometimes seems totake less and less to set things off which just adds fuel to the fire i.e. whats wrong with me? why cant i cope with the things i used to? etc. etc.i'll be 100% truthful with you. if i can recover then anyome can do it. there is always light at the end of the tunnel. interesting you say diagnosis of depression made her worse. i honestly think labels can be so unhelpful. i was terrified at one point that i was going to degenerate into bi-polar disorder or schizophrenia. sounds preposterous to the average joe but even an episode of casualty with a character suffering one of these problems would really scare me. all it is is insecurity, loss of self esteem and emotional tiredness. no wonder your lady is suffering from the life she had. sounds like shes been living on the edge of her nerves since she was a child which is so tragic but not irreversible. i honestly believe that mate. hardest.thing is maybe learning to believe she can change after years of struggling. it can.seem impossible when you are in the middle of it but she can do it. you sound like a really caring guy as well. i know it can put a strain on a relationship. chins up.

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