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Thread: Depression

  1. #501
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    Aye, glad to see you're feeling a bit perkier wharfee
    Poacher turned game-keeper

  2. #502
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    Keep on trucking matey

  3. #503
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    Struggling against life and other forces.

    All up hill at this moment

    Can I say that????

    Cause its true.
    Last edited by Derby Tup; 18-11-2017 at 05:43 AM.

  4. #504
    Senior Member Mr1470's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stagger View Post
    Struggling against life and other forces.

    All up hill at this moment.

    Can I say that????

    Cause its true.
    I hope things get better for you.

    But I feel the biggest obstacle is that last sentence. Is it true? In life, we have all sorts of sh*t thrown at us and the bottom line is that the way forward is to realise that we cannot control what other people do or what "life" does to us, but we can, in the end, control the way we react to it. Of course, that is much easier said than done, and there are multiple ways of getting to that point. We all have to find the best method that suits us.

    But, it seems to me, the first crucial step is to acknowledge, truly and honestly, that the only person who can control our happiness or otherwise, is ourselves. Whilst we blame others, we create ourselves as a "victim" and all of the negative connotations that go with that. We need to break out from that position. Good luck with doing that.

    (And I speak as one who spent too many years blaming others.......)
    Last edited by Derby Tup; 18-11-2017 at 05:43 AM.

  5. #505
    Senior Member Mr1470's Avatar
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    You're missing the point Stagger. Some people have nothing, some people seemingly have everything. And yet some of the happiest people I've met are the ones with nothing and some of the unhappiest are the ones with "everything". The only difference in those people is the ability to recognise what they do have rather than what they don't.

    If you continue to think your happiness rests in the hands of someone else, then you will continue to suffer. Look inward for the answers and find strength. Good luck.
    Loving life in the Highlands

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  6. #506
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stagger View Post
    You are that wise man Wheeze.

    I know of no higher fortitude than stubborness in the face of overwhelming odds. Louis Nizer

    “There is no fortitude like patience, just as there is no destructive emotion worse than hatred.” Auliq-Ice

    Honesty and integrity are absolutely essential for success in life - all areas of life. The really good news is that anyone can develop both honesty and integrity

    Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you. H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

    We learned about honesty and integrity - that the truth matters... that you don't take shortcuts or play by your own set of rules... and success doesn't count unless you earn it fair and square. Michelle Obama

    Thanks Wheeze, you have got me thinking along a slightly different path.
    Stagger, we've touched on this before.
    Hold onto the 'thinking along a slightly different path'....its your way to a better place, honest.
    Simon Blease
    Monmouth

  7. #507
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    Thanks again fellas.
    Last edited by Derby Tup; 18-11-2017 at 05:45 AM.

  8. #508
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    We can criticise Wiggins, Farrah and others etc, but I can't say a wrong word about my ex????????????????

  9. #509
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    Hi Stagger.

    My best friend and his wife separated around 7 or 8 years ago. There were no other people involved but she didn't love him anymore and told him as much. He was offered the choice of staying in the relationship or leaving. She said she respected him as a father for their kids but could have no physical contact with him.

    He decided he didn't want to live like that so he left. She has really done a number on him and with hindsight engineered a lot of the situation so it would reflect badly on him i.e. he was the one that left the matrimonial home, etc.

    Anyway, he is hands down one of the most decent guys you could meet but she really screwed him - and still is. He is paying half her mortgage whilst working all the hours to take home around £20k a year whereas she has received a big promotion since their separation and is on over £60k a year. It doesn't cut any ice with the CSA or the legal people apparently.

    I ask him how he doesn't get bitter and he says he does at times but he had to let it go as it was going to destroy him. He says it won't always be like that and he is still close to his kids. He's since met someone who is a much better match for him and is happy with her now although I know the position his ex-wife engineered for him still is hard to take.

    Sorry if this seems patronising - it is the last thing I intend - but he had to let go of his bitterness towards her as it was dragging him down even though he was fully entitled to it, believe me.

    Best of British to you matey

  10. #510
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    That's very similar to my situation.
    Fell out of love. (it happens)
    Split. (sad but true)
    Now she is trying to take me to the cleaners. (totally unreasonable and not fair)
    Also dragging it on to mess with my mental illness. (disgusting behaviour)

    Next court is 18th Dec and hopefully that will bring closure and allow me to move on and rebuild my life.

    PS Don't delete the truth DT
    People are being supportive and need to know the truth.

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