lad, there was once a time i would have read your post and not truly understood what you meant. i might have even sneered. there's a bloke at work and he has depression at times due to his gambling, it's like nobodies there when you talk to him, i never understood that either. sometimes you read about people who kill their partners and children through depression and i didn't understand that too. but now, having felt the anger, the frustration, the impotence and thinking people don't believe you, i now understand everything about depression and the things it makes you do and say. it's terrible and dark place to be.