Why Jamie, I've heard that you are far too much of a gentleman to take advantage of a turkey, or any other kind of poultry, even if they are not fit for human consumption and only suitable for skinflint fell-runners.
By the way, if you want to take advantage of this nutritional windfall, the old man has got a large freezer for sale that would grace your new house - just let me know if you are interested.
Ciao.
Her arms are wicked and her legs are long.