Nice one Brett
I told Mrs WP I wanted to be cremated.
She booked me in for next Monday
Richard Taylor
"William Tell could take an apple off your head. Taylor could take out a processed pea."
Sid Waddell
I went to the zoo yesterday, and there was a baguette in a cage.
The sign said it was bread in captivity.
Richard Taylor
"William Tell could take an apple off your head. Taylor could take out a processed pea."
Sid Waddell
What's big, grey and of absolutely no consequence what so ever?
An irrelephant
Am Yisrael Chai
I just spent all morning building a time machine...
Well that's 4 hours of my life I'll definitely get back.
I went to the bottom of our street to use the callbox only to discover that they'd replaced it with a defibrillator.
I had a right shock!
Wildebeests in Africa are being herded with electric prods - that's shocking gnus.
Which English town can trace its origins to before the invention of autocorrect?
Worksop.
In his lifetime he suffered from unreality, as do so many Englishmen.
Jorge Luis Borges
There's two bridges going over the Severn Estuary. The big one's called the Prince of Wales Bridge. The other one's spare.
Simon Blease
Monmouth
I told my friend I liked Beyonce.
He said whatever floats your boat.
I said, no, that’s buoyancy.
Richard Taylor
"William Tell could take an apple off your head. Taylor could take out a processed pea."
Sid Waddell