Moral Dilemma!!

[emmilou]

There’s differing opinions on this one.

I feel torn and stuck between a rock and a hard place!!

My bestest pal at work (H) sits opposite me and is on holiday in France until September the 4th. Her boss, (sits diagonal to me) handed in his notice yesterday. He leaves in a month. (so only a fortnight after she gets back) He’s not telling H until she gets back in the country as he wants her to enjoy the time away. She had no idea he had accepted a job offer before she went or even that he’d had an interview. She will want to apply for his job when it is advertised and also be in a panic about him going no doubt.

The issues I have are these

Will she be pi55ed off with me as her friend for not telling her what’s going on (given we are texting etc while she is away so are in regular contact)

Is it better for her to find out NOW whilst on holiday with all her family (Hubbie is French and they are staying with the massive extended family) so that she can have lots of chats with them and they can reassure her of any concerns etc

Is it better for her to enjoy her holiday blissfully unaware as to what is going on to come back and get thrown straight back into it.

My boss reckons I should say nothing, let her enjoy her holiday and come back to be told by her boss directly.

I’ve considered talking to her boss myself and saying I think it would be better to break the news sooner rather than later but seem to be in a minority about this. I just think I’d like to know but don’t know what to do? If I tell her and it ruins the holiday I’ll be gutted, if I don’t and she tells me off for saying nothing I’ll be gutted too! Do I respect her boss’s wishes and say nothing or go with what I think I should do as a friend???

Maybe I should just run away and go on holiday too?!

[Ady In Accy]

Maybe I should just run away

Hameldon Hill then, 3pm?

Say nowt (unless your previous texts have been about work). Let her enjoy the holiday. Work smurk.

[Derby Tup]

Do what you'd hope a friend would do for you. It sounds like an interesting opportunity for her and I cannot see how knowing would spoil her break

Dilemma would be much bigger if she'd lost her job while away

[Antisocial]

Unless she asked you directly by text if anything has happened whilst she is away or the job will be advertised whilst she is away meaning she will miss the closing date (or it will close very shortly after she comes back) let her enjoy her leave.

[emmilou]

Dilemma would be much bigger if she'd lost her job while away

This is very true!

I still don't know!

[emmilou]

Unless she asked you directly by text if anything has happened whilst she is away or the job will be advertised whilst she is away meaning she will miss the closing date (or it will close very shortly after she comes back) let her enjoy her leave.

She text only this morning asking how was work...gave the usual reply I'm trying to find out when they are advertising the position and dates etc as that was my main concern, noone seems forthcoming with the information though

[emmilou]

Hameldon Hill then, 3pm?

Say nowt (unless your previous texts have been about work). Let her enjoy the holiday. Work smurk.

will still be stuck here then.

going to do the memorial race over in rochdale

[DazTheSlug]

personally, I wouldn't want to know, as it would spoil my hols, but it depends on whether you think she would want to know!?

one possibility might be to wait til just a day or two before she comes back before telling her, just so she has a bit of a heads-up without spoiling all her hols...

[noel]

Would your friend be able to prepare in any meaningful way (organise supporting information, draft applications, etc) if you did tell her early? If the answer is no, I suggest not telling her. If it were me on holiday, I would be stressed that I couldn't do anything to influence the situation.

[emmilou]

Good replies...thankyou. Think I'll keep schtum for now and pretend everything is normal?? eek.