Bulking Up

[IanDarkpeak]

Golden Shower LOL

[Multiterrainer]

John, forget the confrontation in the pub - why not just challenge him to a race up and down your local fell with the winner getting to keep the girl!!?

[plodding bear]

The camelbak down the sleeve is a top idea - I've just tried it out in a pub in Silsden. I felt a bit like a piss-throwing Spiderman, right up until my nose got broken.

[The devil's own]

I'm half tempted to take Eavesy's advice and go to the pub and try and land a sucker punch whilst his back is turned. I'm rubbish at fighting though and don't know how to swing a proper punch. Is it as simple as clenching your fist, winding your arm back like a baseball pitcher and swinging? .

This thread is probably a wind up, but just in case it isn't:

Ah at which point did I suggest a sucker punch from behind? Thats the work of a cu*t, and I don't believe in it. If you're gonna hit someone, square up to them and do it. Sounds like you have no clue how to throw a punch, and you ain't gonna learn in 3 weeks. All the force for a punch is generated through proper footwork and the hips. If you don't know this, then I suggest you don't even try. If you're feeling brave though and he does start with you may I suggest grabbing him by the ear, nutting him as hard as you can - make sure you land this on his nose and not forehead to forehead. And then keep holding his ear and keep nutting his nose. Whatever you do don't let go of that ear, if you can't hit him just rag on the ear. He won't want to knock you down, as you'll take his ear with you. He'll soon give up when he realizes he'll lose his ear if he doesn't. And it's always a good idea to act like you've totally lost it when doing this. People would often prefer to fight someone thats hard, rather than clearly mental.

[JohnM32]

Great idea Eavesy. Only problem is that I'll probably get sacked if I go into work with bruises all over my head so I think I'll use a small rounders bat instead. Do you think this will be as effective? I was thinking about waiting for him to go to the bar so he has his hands full with drinks, grab his ear and whack him on the nose with the bat as you suggest.

Good point about looking mental. I'll style my hair in a Mohawk before I go out. No-one messes with a Mohawk.

Thanks so much for your good ideas.

[stevefoster]

Good point about looking mental. I'll style my hair in a Mohawk before I go out. No-one messes with a Mohawk.

Then your worries are over, no further action required. Now get out for a run you daft lad:closed:

[john doe]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nd6VIgWlPv4 dunno if you can still get these. If not try sneaking up on him and pinning a "kick me" sign on his back, then everyone else will do the job for you...........Surprised that french guy Damien aint got some ideas........

[Rodders]

You could always try this. It doesn't matter if you can't afford the 'shake weight' I'm guessing you are well used to the hand movement.

[JohnM32]

You could always try this. It doesn't matter if you can't afford the 'shake weight' I'm guessing you are well used to the hand movement.

Sorry, I don't understand. Please explain

[Rodders]

Sorry, I don't understand. Please explain

Perhaps this musical infomercial will help you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vCkJQATwZE