hmmmmmmmmmmm
A can of spray cream is about £1.50
Ann Summers Pink Fluffy Hand cuffs £8.50
Various items of fruit £1.97
Johnsons Baby Oil £1.83
Asda Value Stockings £2.25 pack of 3 (some may be ripped!)
Booths pork pie £1.95
Hob nob's £1.50
The above comes to a total of £19.50
The invoice amount is £24.00
The late payment terms are as laid out in the T&C's of the contract you agreed to, such being said item 1.411 late payment refers to an addition of 1000% per day, for late payment.
As you state you have not paid and it seems you have no intention to, we feel that the T&C's as pointed out above will now be applied with out prejudice
The account is overdue by 7 days
New total £467,692,104.00
That being said we are a willing to negotiate the above amount with reference to the first paragraph of the above, with the inclusion of certain amounts of beer, and a hotel room.
I await your response