Bulking Up

[The devil's own]

Great idea Eavesy. Only problem is that I'll probably get sacked if I go into work with bruises all over my head so I think I'll use a small rounders bat instead.

If you take a bat to him, I hope he takes it off you and gives you a good hiding. Again I still think this is a wind up, though stranger things have happened. If this is true your clearly a bit of a bell end, and a bit of a slap might be what you need

Maybe you need to become:

[L.F.F.]

It's the big day John! Off down the pub later aren't you?

Glad to see you've had an early start.

How's preparation going? I'm picturing skipping ropes, a battered punch bag, The Eye of The Tiger blaring from your walkman and a bucket of steaming piss in the corner...

[Derby Tup]

...skipping ropes, a battered punch bag, The Eye of The Tiger blaring from your walkman and a bucket of steaming piss in the corner...

This belongs on the poetry thread LFF

[L.F.F.]

This belongs on the poetry thread LFF

Thanks As does John who'll be poetry in motion this evening. Floats likes a butterfly, shoots with his wee.

[Dr H Tool]

The best thing to do is shadow boxing with a mirror, when you draw blood you will be ready :angry:

[Dynamo Dan]

John before you confront your nemesis listen to this for inspiration:


Let us know how it goes mate.

[Skarsnik]

no, this may bring back bad memories of Clubber Lang.

John before you confront your nemesis listen to this for inspiration:


Let us know how it goes mate.

[JohnM32]

If you take a bat to him, I hope he takes it off you and gives you a good hiding. Again I still think this is a wind up, though stranger things have happened. If this is true your clearly a bit of a bell end, and a bit of a slap might be what you need

Hi Eavesy. I was only considering a bat because there's a lot of posers in my profession and going into work with bruises on your head is a big no no. So you think I shouldn't use a bat? My friend suggested a pool ball in a sock or a belt with a big metal buckle - what do you think? I'm not sure I could accurately hit his nose so not sure.

Judging by your forum name, you're a girl / woman but you seem to know how to fight. Have you done one of those Martial Arts for women courses? Do you have any last minute tips? I was reading on the internet about them and the women always seem to overpower much bigger men which is what I need to do.

Your friend,

John

[Rodders]

Have you done one of those Martial Arts for women courses?

I can't find one of those, but I found this, which might help:

[matthew]

Hi Eavesy. I was only considering a bat because there's a lot of posers in my profession and going into work with bruises on your head is a big no no. So you think I shouldn't use a bat? My friend suggested a pool ball in a sock or a belt with a big metal buckle - what do you think? I'm not sure I could accurately hit his nose so not sure.

Have you considered one of these? http://www.fashionablecanes.com/6001...157_a_7c600180
I find the name of it particularly apt.

Alternatively, become a hermit.